A Few Funny Jokes From Reader's Digest

(Colorado)
How do you know you're in the
presence of a real Coloradan?
He caries a his $3,000 mountain
bike atop his $500 car.

(Massachusetts)
Lewis Black on Boston traffic:
"The last person to get across
the town under three hours
was yelling, 'The British are
coming! the British are coming!

(Michigan)
What do you call 40 guys
watching the Super bowl
on television? The Detroit Lions

(New Mexico)
Traveling outside Taos, a man
comes upon a Native American
lying in the middle of the road
with his ears pressed against
the blacktop. "What are you
doing?" asks the man. The
tribesman replies, "Woman late
30's, three kids, one barking dog
in late model, four-door station
wagon, traveling at 65 mph."
"Amazing you can tell all that
just by listening to the ground?"
"No." says the Native American.
"They just ran over me over five
minutes ago."

(Montana)
Four women are driving across
the country together each one from
a different state: Idaho, Nebraska,
Montana, and California. Shortly after
the trip begins, the woman from Idaho
pulls out potatoes from her bag and
throws them out the window. " What
are you doing ?" asked the Nebraskan.
"We have so many of these things in
Idaho, I'm sick of looking at them."
A moment later, the gal from Nebraska
pulls ears of corn from her bag and tosses
them out of the window . "What are you
doing ?" asks the gal from Montana."We
have to many of these things in Nebraska,
I'm sick of looking at them." Inspired, the
Montanan opens the car door an kicks the
Californian out.

That is my favorite.
And I will have more later,
but I have to go now.

In Six Days

I have six days until I get my braces off. Exciting but I'm not sure I want them off yet. I wonder what I will look like without them. I have to get a retainer a week after I get them taken off. So when I go to get a retainer Mom and I are going to have a date. Boy-O-Boy I cannot wait until our date. Hey, I'm a poet I did not even know it.

My First Piano Lesson

My first piano lesson was yesterday. And I am having a lot of fun with it. I cannot wait to get my school done so I can go play it over at the church building. It is so much fun. Wednesday I learned middle B, C, D, and E out of A, B, C, D, E, F and G. And I learned what a whole note is, a half note and a quarter note. I learned what a treble clef is and what a bass (base) cleft is . I learned what a staff is and what bar lines are. A few little songs I learned were The Train, The Seabees, Grandfather's Clock, Moccasin Dance, March of the Gnomes, Dance of the Gnomes, Mary Had a Little lamb and Birthday Party. It was so fun. I want to learn more next Wednesday.

Outside is so Awesome

Today I was outside doing my math and these are some things that I noticed.
I heard the wood pecker peck...
I saw the butterfly fly...
I heard the cars pass ...
I heard the crows talk to each other.
I guess it is not that much but I just thought it was so nice to listen and watch the things that God created. When you are outside sitting on your porch swing or just outside, stand still, listen and watch...you will know that God created the earth.

My Beautiful Bird

I got a female canary Sept. 6. It was the day after we got back from camping. I have had fun with it. I am sharing it with my mom. We still have not named it yet. My mom wants its name to be Pretty Bird, I don't know about that name. If any of y'all people out there read this post, help me with a name.

I think it was the day after I got her that I actually got it to stand on my hand and eat seed off of my hand...just for a few seconds. To get seed she would get closer and closer then scoot over, but sooner or later she would get close enough to take a seed or two from my hand and scoot over and munch on it.

The way I got my bird was I worked for Miss Star White. She owns a store called Fine Feathers and Fins. She sells birds and fish. She also sells bird and fish supplies. And a few odds-and-ends that she special ordered for people and they never picked them up. Like turtle food. She had frog food because she once sold frogs but they are all gone now. Anyways I fed & watered her birds and fed her fish. So that's that.

Oh yeah! This is funny! My dad bought me a mirror for our bird and it had a seed holder where you can put her treat. Anyway, she will fight with her own reflection. At least I think that's what she is doing.

I may write more about my bird later. Well, I've got to go.

Produce from our Garden after a Week of Camping

We went camping from Tuesday morning to Friday evening. The next day, after we got home, we went out to our garden and picked and this is what we got. We picked yellow squash, carrots, peppers, onions, zucchini squash, different types of cucumbers I think, purple cabbage, tomatoes, and cauliflower. That is quite a bit of stuff for almost a week.

A Great Song

This is one of my favorite songs. It is sad but sweet.

A day with my friends

I hung out with my friends Barbara and Audrey from eleven to seven At eleven Audrey and her mom came to pick me up so we could hang out. And Barbara was going to drive down from her house. It was the best day ever.

A couple of the things we did were....

go to the farm

ride horses

went fishing

ate ice cream

hung out in the loft

hunted for frogs

walked on the roof

checked our E-mail


and last but not least we wrestled for the last thirty minutes

...and boy it was a rough thirty minutes .

My Friend Barbara

My friend Barbra is the best friend ever. She's all grown up but still a kid if you know what I mean. She jumps on the trampoline, she hangs out with us kids, she colors with us and she stays up until three in the morning with me. Once she invited me over to the Bender's where she was housesitting with her sister Kacey. That was when we stayed up until three in the morning. We had one of the jar like things of jelly beans from Costco. Well any way that was about 1/2 way full and when we were done eating them we could see the bottom. We had a bowl of cereal with a lot of sugar on top. And we had a bag of mixed candy from Costco and it was about 1/2 way gone too. We ate all that in one night. I am sure that we ate something else too. I cannot wait until Barbra, Kacey and I housesit at the Bender's again.She left a comment on my post about My Powerful Papa and asked, "Am I not a good enough friend?" So I had to type about her.
Barbra you are a good enough friend for me.

My Amazing Brother Matthew

Matthew is the second oldest boy in our family. He is 13 years old. He is an awesome brother. He is good at playing the PS2. Whenever Lucas and I want to play him he says you have to die 8 times and then hand the controller to the next person. Our turns are gone pretty quick. I love him... because he includes us when he plays with his friends, he plays games with our whole family, he plays Lego's, he jumps on the trampoline and he helps Lucas on his math. There are so many things I could say about him. But I am not going to go through them all right now.

A couple of the things he likes to eat is:
steamed broccoli
cooked carrots
ramen noodles
cream of wheat

Got to go, bye.

My Powerful Papa

My Papa is the best Papa anyone could ever have. He is loving, comforting, playful, healthy, strong, kind, fun, cool, crafty and understanding. If you had him as a papa you would be living the good life. A couple of the things that he does is...build Lego's, go camping, ride horses but not that often, go hunting and preaches.

Last night he kept saying to me (jokingly) that he was sorry that he was not a good enough papa. I didn't get why he kept saying that. So I asked him when he was in bed.

I said, "What did mom do? What did I do? What did us kids do?"

Mom said, "Ask the second question again."

So I asked the second question again and told me to ask Mom. I asked my mom and she said, "You did not say anything about him in the profile on your blog." So this morning I put him in my profile. And now he is happy.

Hey Papa, I love you so much.

My Big Brother Justin

Justin is the oldest kid in our family. He is 17 years old. He is a really good brother. One day Justin, Lucas, Katie, Larah, and I went to the creek to go on a walk and to go look at the creek. Katie fell on the bridge. So Justin carried Katie all the way home. Which is a long way to carry Katie. He understands what you are going through when you talk to him. He always wants to hear what's up and what is bothering me. This year he has been keeping up with his goals and been getting done with his school. He is learning how to play the guitar. He is really good. He has been getting on line and printing notes to the guitar. He is really in to learning more about the guitar and wants to know more songs and stuff like that. He just got his permit this year. And when mom needs to go to the store or the post office and places like that, he offers to drive. Justin and I made a pizza together: it was supposed to be a really good chocolate pizza with peanuts, M&M's and stuff like that. All we had were chocolate chips and peanut butter chips. So we melted the chocolate chips and the peanut butter chips together and tried to make a swirl. But it did not work because it all melted into one color. But it tasted great. Justin is a great brother who likes to spend time with me.

Kaija's

Two days ago my mom and I went to Kaija's with some friends. One of moms friend's friend had a question about her bird. If you like the outdoors, reptiles, rodents, fish and birds you would love this store. I do love all those things. Now I know why when mom is in a hurry to get home and she has to pick something up from Kaija's, she never takes me in with her. I could spend hours in Kaija's. A couple of the things I did while at Kaija's...

I got to hold a rat

I got pecked by a chick

I held a cat

I looked at the turtles

I looked at a huge leopard gecko

I got to pet a bunny

I got to pet a geanui pig

And last but not least, I got to pet a duck. It was really funny because when the worker man went to get one of the ducks they all went crazy and started running around in their cage.

My Braces

Yesterday I got my braces. I like the color I picked. They are blue. I have not told anyone I got them, except for my family. My brother was the first to know. I called our home because my papa said to call him when we got out of the orthodontist. Papa was not there; he was over at the church building playing pool with Lucas. So my brother Justin pick up the phone and I told him all about it thinking that I was talking to my papa. Then I said, "Who is this"? He said, "Justin". After I hung up with him I called my papa's cell phone. Of course he did not have it and Justin picked it up again. Then I hung up with him again. After my appointment me and my mom walked over to where our friends were. Later on in the day Papa called and I told him all about my new braces. My mouth is very sore today. The best thing about getting braces is that I got string cheese and yogurt which are never in our house. And all the kids were asking me for little bites. I told most of them no. But Katie was too cute so I had to give her a bite.

A Small Zoo in our Back Yard

Two nights ago Justin and I went to the kitchen. I do not really know why. I think we were making sure that the doors were locked. Anyways there were three possums in our yard. One was by my papa's porch, one was under our church steps and one was at the end of our picnic table, which is on our porch. We had a small zoo in our backyard. They are not easy to spook. You can knock on the door and they do not run away. Katie, Lucas, Matthew, Justin and I were looking at them through the window. They have weird tails. It only lasted for about five minutes.

Another Walk with My Friend

Miss Linda and I went on another walk to Silvercreek. My dad said there was a pretty black duck down there. So we went to the creek to see the duck. But it had flown away before we got there. While we were there we walked on the rocks, found a four leaf clover and sang "This Little Light Of Mine" under the bridge. It echoed really loud. On the way home we saw a wounded bird. We went home really quick and ask my mom if we could go back and catch it and try to nurse it back to health. She said it was ok if we did. So we went back to try to catch it. I chased it all around a yard. I scared it enough that it flew away. It was a very good walk.

About my Mom

My mom is the best mom that any one could ever have. According to this picture she is crazy, sweet, loving, kind, understanding, beautiful...very, very beautiful. She is also a really good cook . A couple of the things she cooks are hash browns, potato soup, biscuits and gravy and meatloaf. She made a really good pan of meatloaf about three weeks ago. She says that she does it with love. I think she does do it with love because if it wasn't done with love, it would not taste that good. Every thing she makes tastes awesome.

Mom, I love you so much.

Not Knowing

Today I stuck a sticker on my mom's back. She still does not know. She looks pretty funny. I don't think she will find out until she reads my blog or when she takes a shower. I love my mom. She is loving, caring, helpful, and she is a teacher too. There are a lot of other things that she is but I am not going to list them all right now.

A Day with my Friend

Two days ago was my best friend's birthday. Her name is Miss Linda. We went on a walk down Morris Road, Miller Road, Gharet Road, and Silverbrook Road. We picked flowers, threw rocks in the creek, caught sleet with our tongues and collected rocks from the creek. It was a pretty good day. I enjoyed myself and she did too. She said that it was the best birthday that she has ever had. I believe her. She said she would write about it in her journal. I gave her a plant called Hens and Chicks with a pretty card. I gave her one a long time ago, but when she had eye surgery, she forgot to water it and it died. So she was happy when I gave it to her. She is the best friend that anyone could ever have.

A Walk with my Mom

My mom, my little sister, and I went on a walk about two weeks ago. It was a nice day. It was the only nice day we have had in the last three weeks. I picked two daffodils. I gave one to a friend of mine and the other one is in our window sill dying. I need to throw it out. While we were on our walk we looked at a little creek. It was beautiful. And then we looked at a really ugly pond like thing on the side of the road. It had a lot of algae in it and no living creatures.

Hey Mom, thanks for letting me walk with you.

My Cat

I got my cat when I was 4 years old. I have had her for six years. The story on her is that my dad went to go visit some friends on his way home from his school in Vancouver. He came home and told Matthew to get his dirty clothes out of his bag because he had spent the night with his friends. He did not have dirty clothes. He had a cat and when Matthew opened the bag the cat climbed out of it. Matthew named her Precious. I had the saddest face on when two cats did not jump out. Then my dad said, "Oh, I forgot my computer at their house." So he went back and of course he had to get another cat, not his computer. When my dad got home he told me to get his computer out of his bag, so I did and another cat popped out. I named her Elisha. She is so pretty.

She always comes for breakfast when I shake her food bowl. She reads with me in our hammock for thirty minutes. She eats lunch with me. The funny part is that she eats what I eat a lot of the time. Once I had soup and it had cooked carrots in it. I cannot stand cooked carrots but my cat loves them. So I gave all the cooked carrots to her. She had a pretty good lunch and was very happy. Sorry Mom.

My Little Sister's First Birthday

This is my little sister Larah's first birthday. She turned 1 on January 4th. She has never had her own cake before. You can see she was a mess. Larah has had cake before when someone was feeding it to her, but not all by herself. She is so cute. If you were with her for five minutes you would know she's a keeper. She knows how to play peek-a-boo. The amazing part is that she is good at it. She is so grownup. She can say Papa and Mama and she is a good copy cat. When you say "Mmmmmm" she says "Mmmmmm". I am so glad she came into our life a year ago.